Growing up sucks.
Remember when you were a little kid and your whole world was the 20 block radius around your house? When your greatest source of stress was wondering if mom cooked canned peas for dinner? The most serious relationship you had was with Luke, the boy who lived around the corner and up the street, and you secretly held hands when nobody was watching? The big report you had due on Friday was about Macaw parrots?
Those were the days...
Time goes by faster now. A week, a month, a year - by the way, where the hell did 2012 go? It's almost Thanksgiving and I don't even remember Saint Patrick's Day (but that might be for different reasons). I've caught myself operating in auto-pilot over and over again. Get up, eat, go to work, come home, eat, go to bed. No part of that is fulfilling. It's boring as hell. And it makes me so effing pissed off.
I always vowed to lead an exciting life. Whether that meant skydiving or making new friends on a weekday, I didn't really care, I just wanted to fill my life with new and different experience as much as possible. Now it seems, all I can afford is to dream. And man, I have some dreams.
I daydream about a post-apocalyptic world ravaged by zombies and how I would escape, who I would take with me, and where I'd set up camp to repopulate the world.
I daydream about the house I want to live in someday, who I want to live with, in a heavily wooded mountainside, living off the land.
I daydream about traveling the world, jumping out of airplanes, eating bizarre foods, sleeping between expensive sheets, meeting important people, climbing huge mountains, and listening to live music.
But all those dreams are just that, dreams.
It's hard to keep my head held high when the things I want seem so far away and unattainable. I know the 80+ hour work week I live doesn't help, and the minimal paycheck helps less, but I know it's all for my dreams. Working hard is hard, but when it pays off, I'll be the happiest person you'll know, because I will be traveling the world, jumping out of planes and eating bizarre foods. I'll sponsor a kids soccer team. I'll buy my mom a vacation to Italy. I'll build my business bigger and better. I'll build that house in the woods.
And life will be exciting again.
